I'm not lesbian!
by Merciless Ruby
Summary: What happens when Rukia brings Chizuru to Seireitei; and Chizuru starts flirting with Momo? How will Toushiro react? Does he really think Momo's a lesbian? HitsuHina!


_**I do not own Bleach! Please visit my profile! Please review!**_

* * *

Chizuru shrieked and embraced Rukia.

"I love this place! It's so neat and there are so many hot women around; _especially _that Matsumoto one! Her breasts were so big, I just wanted to eat them! Too bad she ran away from me..."

Rukia rolled her eyes as she continued showing her friend around Seireitei. It's been two hours since Chizuru arrived with Rukia and so far, she has met many people; actually, _women_.

Chizuru finds most women of Seireitei hotter than the human ones. For example:

She loves Matsumoto in general. Sadly, Matsumoto doesn't want to be near her ever again.

She thinks Nemu's hair is awesome and she wishes to touch it if she and her ever had sex: too bad that won't happen since Nemu told herself not to even be near her.

She likes Yachiru's giggle; and told the young shinigami that she will wait for her once she's older... and taller.

She's infatuated with Nanao's face. Chizuru told her that she loved innocent faces. For once in her life time, Nanao got so scared that she _had _to say that she was taken - and her captain was the only guy she could think of. Well, at least Shunsui enjoyed pretending to be Nanao's boyfriend for about twenty minutes.

"Who else should we visit!?" Chizuru asked her.

"I don't know...you practically scared every woman in Seireitei awa-"

"Scared every woman away, ehh?"

Rukia and Chizuru turned around and saw Zaraki standing behind them. Rukia gulped as Chizuru's eyes widened.

"Whoa! Look at those _muscles_!" Chizuru said, rubbing Zaraki's arms.

The tall captain smirked.

"You like them, eh? Well, why don't I try them on you?"

Chizuru smirked as she began to purr like a cat.

"Oh, I would love to!"

Zaraki walked away, smirking to himself. Rukia stared bewilderingly at the pink haired girl.

"So, who else should we visit?" asked Chizuru.

"Um, oh...uh, I have another friend and I know you'll like her."

"Alright then! Show me to her!"

* * *

Momo sighed as she was soon finished with the last stack of paperwork. She glanced at the clock and noticed that four hours has passed since she started.

_No wonder Hitsugaya-kun is always complaining about paperwork..._

Groaning tiredly, she left the papers as a mess on the desk and threw herself on the couch. But as just as she was going to close her eyes and take a long nap, she heard a loud knocking on her door.

_That better not be Matsumoto asking me to go on a date with Shiro-chan..._

She dragged her feet on the clean surface of the wooden floor and opened the door. Her eyebrows cocked up confusingly as the pink haired girl in front of her giggled.

"Hi! You must be Momo Hinamori! My name is Chizuru and Rukia told me a lot about you! I know you had a hard time before with your ex-captain, but don't worry _I'm here to help you_!"

Momo blinked confusingly.

"Um, thanks? I can see that you're human-"

"Yes I am! And I can see that you have small, but nice breasts!"

Momo blushed as she stood behind the door, covering herself. Chizuru skipped inside and looked around.

"Wow, you live here by yourself?"

"This is actually my office, but I do live by myself."

Chizuru looked at her and pouted.

"Aw, that's so sad. You know, while I am here, we can have a little fun for a few hours so you can remember something _exciting_!"

Momo blinked at her but suddenly flinched as Chizuru's arms were wrapped around her neck.

"What are you doing?"

Chizuru giggled and pushed the fuku-taichou on the couch, climbing then on top of her.

"Don't worry, you'll enjoy it." she told her, brushing Momo's hair with her fingers.

* * *

Toushirou gulped, holding the bouquet of roses tightly.

_Remember taichou! Ask nicely or you'll be rejected!_

Matsumoto's voice rang inside his mind as he continued making his way towards his crush's office. His heart began to beat faster and faster as he got closer to her office.

_What if she rejects me? What if she's still in love with Aizen?_

He stood in front of her office and sighed, taking a deep breath before knocking the door. After knocking, he waited a few seconds for her to response.

"I have to get that." Momo said, hearing someone familiar knock on the door.

"No no!" Chizuru said, pushing her back on the couch, " We should start our _fun_!"

Toushirou scratched his head confusingly. He knew she was there, but not alone.

_Open up, Bed-Wetter Momo_!

He got tired of knocking and opened the door. The captain looked around and all of the sudden, he almost dropped the roses once seeing some stranger on top of Momo.

But what was more odd about the situation was that the stranger was a _girl_.

_Momo's lebian?_

He was beyond shocked about the situation; and he did not know what to think. Meanwhile, Momo gulped as she saw the boy she only loves stare at her with widened eyes.

"Sh-Shiro-chan?"

Chizuru looked at the boy and glared at him.

"What are you doing here!? We were about to start our fun!"

Toushirou was about to flip, but Momo pushed Chizuru off her and ran over to her childhood friend.

"Momo, who's this midget freak?"

"Momo, who's this ugly-lesbian bitch?"

The brunette gulped as she stared at her friend.

"Shiro-chan, this is Chizuru and she's Rukia's friend. She was just visiting me; but she's leaving right now." Momo explained, turning her head and glaring at Chizuru at the end of her sentence.

Chizuru crossed her arms in front of her chest and pouted her lips angrily.

"Fine! I'm leaving then and never coming back!"

She began to stomp out of the office, but as she passed by Momo, she immediately gave a gentle slap on her ass and quickly ran away. Momo shrieked as Toushirou felt like having a heart attack.

"So, you're a..."

"I'm not a lesbian!" she cried to him angrily.

Toushirou stared at her blankly, but then smirked as he found another way to tease her.

"And how am I going to believe you?"

Momo groaned. Grabbing him by his shirt, she pulled him closer and kissed his lips. Toushirou was surprised by her sudden action, but he let her take advantage of the kiss since he was enjoying it too much.

"See, I'm not a lesbian!"

"Hmmm, I still don't believe you, lesbian."

Momo growled, but then calmed down and smirked.

"Fine, if I'm lesbian, then you're gay! And I have no poblem telling Matsumoto first!

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**_Please review!  
_**


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